Why Do I Keep Buying Things I Don't Need?

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You ever brought something home, then instantly regretted that purchase.

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Or maybe you feel like you're in this cycle of constantly acquiring

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things, but still searching for true satisfaction in your life.

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Well, what if you could understand the why behind that and why you

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keep buying things you don't need?

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And finally, break free from that cycle.

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I want you to stick with me today 'cause I'm gonna show you exactly how

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to make that happen on today's show.

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Hey there.

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Welcome back to your Daily, financially Confident Christian.

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I'm Ralph and it's great to be with you again.

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Today we continue on our pursuit, answering that question of how can I

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become a financially confident Christian?

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And we're in our series Beyond the Budget, finding Financial

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Freedom through Intentional Living.

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And if you've been following along, you know, so far we've covered contentment.

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We talked about gratitude, we talked about spending by values, and today

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we're gonna answer a more difficult question, and that is, why do I

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keep buying things I don't need?

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I think it's a great question because if you're like me, you feel this at

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times, maybe you're feeling it right now, and think about it like this.

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You go for one item at the grocery store.

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This is the typical situation, right?

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I gotta go in and just grab one thing, but then you come out with five.

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Or maybe you're online shopping or you're walking through Target or something

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and a deal just grabs your attention and you feel fantastic for the moment,

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oh, these shoes are fantastic, or, or this, sure, oh, I gotta have this shirt.

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Then later you just feel regret and you're stuck in this impulse buy cycle.

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And I'm betting right now you're saying Ralph, that's familiar to

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me and boy, that is frustrating.

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And in the end All it does is adds clutter.

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It drains our savings and it brings guilt.

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'cause you're working hard, you're working so hard, I know you're working

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hard, but your money just disappears.

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And I'm gonna say something rather bold right now in my personal view.

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The core issue is you're buying isn't aligned with your

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values or intentional living.

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That's really what it comes down to.

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So here's the thing, and companies know how to manipulate your spending habits.

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There are teams of people spending every minute to try to figure

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out how to make you buy more, how to buy additional things.

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And they prey on your emotions.

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They prey on them.

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That's their job.

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They pray on boredom.

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Hey, I've got nothing to do.

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I'm bored.

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They pray on insecurity.

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Oh, you gotta have this.

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They prey on stress.

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And most of the time as we're doing this, we're trying to fill a void, a word.

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We're trying to find some momentary joy in the tough situations in life.

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Look at the book of Ecclesiastes chapter five.

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Verse 10 says this, whoever loves money never has enough.

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This too is meaningless.

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Let's just park there for a second and let's, let's, let's dissect this.

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Whoever loves money, the love of money, if that's where your

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love is, what does the word say?

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You never have enough.

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Why is that?

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Because you're buying to, so the motion or you're buying to gain approval,

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those things will never satisfy you.

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So how do you break out of it?

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You recognize your triggers because once you recognize your triggers, you're

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going to be able to respond wisely.

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And listen, this isn't about shame.

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This is about living in a sense of stewardship.

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That's what this show is all about, and it's choosing intentionality,

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that is the big word for this new series, choosing intentionality.

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When you make that choice, it is powerful and it is absolutely freeing.

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So now you're asking Ralph, what can we do?

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How do you stop buying what you don't need?

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And I kind of mentioned it a minute ago, the simple solution is to

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identify your impulse triggers and create delayed base strategies.

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I want you to remember this simple phrase, awareness.

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Plus pause equals self-control.

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I'm gonna say that one more time 'cause it's, you gotta

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commit this to memory awareness.

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You're aware and you take that pause that equals self-control.

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So here's your one action step for today.

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To really get to the point of breaking that cycle, I want you

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to identify one or two impulse triggers, and I want you to do this.

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I want you to apply this exercise to that.

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When you do that, when you start thinking about those impulse triggers, think about

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where you were and what you were feeling.

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Let's talk about some of those examples right now.

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So let's say it's the end of a day.

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You're laying in bed, you're tired, and you're scrolling at night.

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Okay?

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So where were you?

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You were laying in bed after a long day.

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You got your phone in hand, okay, you got the picture.

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What were you feeling?

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Now if you're like many of us, you're feeling drained.

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Been a long day.

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This happened, this crisis at work, this crisis with the kids, and you're

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just looking for some comfort or you're looking to just have a minute to escape.

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So what's the trigger here?

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The trigger here is pretty straightforward.

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Emotional fatigue, that's a problem.

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Late night scrolling on Instagram or Amazon, there's your trigger.

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How about this one?

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Maybe you're bored at work.

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It's a mid-afternoon.

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You're in that mid-afternoon slump.

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So where were you?

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You're sitting at the desk after a soy afternoon, you had the lunch.

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And here like me, three o'clock comes, you're like, I need a nap.

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So let's ask the next question.

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How are you feeling?

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Well, I'm feeling bored.

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I'm feeling tired.

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I'm feeling unmotivated.

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So what do you do?

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You're right there in front of your computer working.

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Let's just say you working a desk job or you're right there, have your

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phone, you're feeling boredom, and you got easy access to online shopping

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during work breaks is a trigger.

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This is my final example for today.

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That fear of missing out pressure from friends.

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Let's say you're in the middle of a group chat and you're buzzing about a

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new sail, or one of your friends has got this new pair of jeans or whatever

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the cool things are these days, or, or maybe somebody's going on a weekend trip.

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That's where you were.

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That's that's where you were, right?

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What are you feeling now?

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Well, Ralph, I was feeling left out.

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I was feeling, I was afraid I was gonna miss something.

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What's the trigger there?

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Well.

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social pressure, right?

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And you're afraid you're gonna miss out on something you're wanting to fit in.

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So here's the challenge for today.

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Real simple.

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I want you to just write down your top one or two triggers.

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What are those triggers for you?

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Is it that boredom at night?

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Is that boredom in the middle afternoon?

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Is that fear of missing out and that social pressure?

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So now you know your triggers.

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Well, here's the antidote to the triggers.

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Here's how you really break outta that cycle.

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I want you to create a simple rule for yourself.

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What I'll call the pause, give you a couple examples.

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Let's say that you're shopping online, Amazon, wherever you like to shop.

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Maybe you're even on Facebook or some social media.

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See these shoes?

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You gotta have a $75 pair of shoes online.

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But here's your rule.

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You're gonna set this rule ahead of time.

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You're gonna say, here's the deal.

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I am not gonna buy anything till it sits in a cart for 48 hours.

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So what do you do?

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You add those shoes to your cart, you set the reminder for four, eight hours,

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and then after two days you come back and you realize, guess what, Ralph?

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I didn't really need them, and you're glad you didn't waste that money.

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So that's one option.

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The four eight hour for you.

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Hey, maybe for you, it's a one week rule.

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Here's another thing you can do.

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That's what I call the three check filter.

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So whenever you go to buy something, ask yourself these three questions.

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Number one.

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Does it align with my values?

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We talked a lot about that yesterday.

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Is it a value of simplicity?

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Is it a value of financial freedom being outta debt, whatever.

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It's ask yourself, does it align with my values?

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Second question, is it in my budget?

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Have I already allocated this money?

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Is the money in my sames got where it is?

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Is it in my budget?

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So does it align my values?

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Is it in my budget?

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Third thing, do you truly need it or is this just an emotional buying situation?

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There we go.

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The pause, the three check filter.

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I'm gonna throw one more at you 'cause I think this will really be impactful.

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A lot of people don't think of this one.

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This is Ralph's big pro tip for today.

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Make it manual, What is that?

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What does Ralph mean by that?

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Here's what you want.

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I want you to do, go to all your shopping app sites and remove your credit cards.

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Don't even have 'em on the site.

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Why?

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'cause I want you to have extra effort in entering those details,

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which is gonna give you space to think about, do I really need this?

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'cause see, it's so easy.

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It's easy for me.

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Amazon's got three or four of my credit cards tied to it.

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I can be wherever and just scroll.

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Oh, beautiful.

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I want that.

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Click here, buy now.

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That's what they want.

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That's what the, that's what the store, that's what the retailers want you to do.

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Put a little friction there for yourself.

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Make it manual.

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And here's a little bonus thing, maybe you wanna do this, have

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what I call a no spend challenge.

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Maybe pick a Saturday and say, I'm gonna play a game where I'm only

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buying essentials on Saturdays.

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Gas, groceries, things you have to have no coffee runs, no browsing Target to

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just take a look, just no spend Saturday.

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But I'm gonna add a little piece to that and I'm, giving a couple little

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extra things today, but I want you to write down the urges that you feel.

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And at the end of the week, go back and look at those urges and write

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down how much money you saved.

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Boy, that is going to be impactful to you.

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How about we pray together, Father God, we just want to thank you for

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your provision in our life, Lord.

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And we confess, Lord, that we often buy from emotion, we don't do it

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with intention, Lord, we don't put it through that three test.

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So Lord, we just ask you right now to help us spot our triggers, help

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us see what those things are and strengthen that self-control, that

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awareness, pause, self-control.

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And Lord, just teach us to find joy and teach us to find peace in you,

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not in purchases, not in stuff.

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And bigger than that, Lord, let us help our finances reflect your purpose in our

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lives, and we ask this in confidence.

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In Jesus' name, Amen.

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Listen to me.

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Break the buying cycle brings peace and it brings freedom.

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So know your triggers.

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Pause before your purchases and challenge yourself today and listen, if this

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show has been impactful to you, if this specific episode has made a difference

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to you, I wanna encourage you right now, share this episode with someone else.

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A lot of people are dealing with financial cycles and financial stress

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and the shame that goes along with that.

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And this show, this particular episode, could really reach out to them.

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So send 'em a text and say, Hey, I listened to this guy Ralph.

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Here's a link to his website.

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It's financially.

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Confident christian.com or go right onto your podcast episode, or maybe

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you're watching this on YouTube and just click share and send it to

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somebody that could be impacted by this.

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I also wanna give you a free gift.

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If you go to my website, again, that's financially

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confident christian.com/master.

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You get a free copy of my book, it's called Mastering Your Finances.

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It's a short read, but it is super impactful.

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I'm gonna encourage you to do that again.

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That's it.

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Financially confident christian.com/master.

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Now, tomorrow on the show, we're gonna talk about how to stop chasing

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what others have and break free from that cycle of comparison.

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Kind of goes along with what we're talking about today.

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So I'm gonna encourage you, don't miss it.

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Now, let's all go out there and be financially confident.

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Christians, you can do this.

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I truly believe in you.

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Believe in yourself.

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Stay financially savvy.

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God bless you, and you have a great day today.