Why Do I Feel Like I'm Not Enough?

Speaker A00:00:37

We live in a world that sells us the lie that our net worth determines our self worth. Every time you scroll through a feed or you walk through a mall, you've been told that you're only one purchase away from being enough.But what if the secret to freedom isn't having more but realizing you can't be bought? So today we're silencing the noise of comparison to hear the truth of contentment. Hello, friend. Ralph Estep Jr. Here.Thank you for joining me on Financially Confident Christian. My goal on this show is to break that cycle of financial shame and help you to find confidence.And today's topic is one of those topics that hits close to home for so many of us, and that's finding freedom from the pressure to be enough through the lens of comparison. You know, I talk about this on the show all the time. We're constantly surrounded by this feeling of comparison.Let's get right to today's listener question. Listener wrote this Ralph there's so much pressure to look successful, and I'm worn down trying to meet it. I don't want to perform anymore.I want to live authentically and feel content. But comparison keeps tugging at me and making me question if what I have is enough.How do I practice real contentment when I'm surrounded by messages that I should want more, be more, have more. I need to find freedom from this. I can feel you on that one. We all need freedom from them. And I want to start off with a big idea today.Contentment is not the fulfillment of what you want, but it's the realization of how much you already have in Christ. Today's going to be about faith and finances completely merged together. But how do you get to that point? It starts by auditing your influence.Now, as an accountant, I love doing audits, but you got to do that here with yourself, too. Identify which voices make you feel inadequate. If you're hearing a voice that makes you feel inadequate, you got to get rid of it.If certain social media accounts or certain friends consistently trigger a sense of lack, give yourself permission to create distance. If you've got a friend that makes you feel that way, I'm going to say something strong. They're not your friend. They're just not your friend.That's not how friends treat each other. If you've got an app or a social media account that's making you feel that same way, that's not your friend either.You're never going to find peace in a place designed to make you feel restless. In my personal view, Most social media is designed to make you feel restless because guess who pays for social media advertisers?It's all about making you want more. And that's a hard thing to battle in our flesh. And one of the ways you can do that is define enough for yourself.The world is never going to give you a finish line, so there's always going to be something else. Oh, I need this, I need that. Just one more thing. One more little thing. One more vacation, one more car, one more vacation home.So today, write down what a sufficient life looks like for you. Based on your needs and God's calling, not based what's on you in your neighbor's driveway. And listen, I'm telling you, I get it.It's so easy to compare ourselves to all those around us. We go on social media, we see people living the high life. We got to do that. We're missing out. But is that your enough?And you have to shift from owning to stewarding. See, this is one of the Christian things I think we can really get into here. When we think we own things, friend, we don't own anything.But when we think we own things, we feel the pressure to keep up. But when we realize we're just stewarding what God has given us, what God has loaned us, that pressure shifts from our performance to his provision.In the first place, you don't own a thing. Now, there's some people probably saying, ralph, I work hard for what I have. That's fair. But God has given you the ability, the abundance to do that.One of the best ways you can do that is what I call practice loud gratitude. I'm talking about super loud. I mean, like blare your ear, speakers popping, latitude. When you feel the urge to compare, immediately, right?Then stop what you're doing and name three things in your life that money didn't buy and money can't replace. Your family, your loved ones, your health, your career. See, gratitude is one of the only known cures for the comparison virus.And comparison is a virus. And it's going to stick with you until you start to break it up.Here's another great way to do that and that celebrate others without diminishing yourself. This is not easy. This takes a little practice. But learn to be generally happy for someone else's success.It's okay to celebrate someone else's success, but don't let that become a commentary on your supposed failure. I see a lot of people say, well, this person's done it, Ralph. I'm so excited for them. But it makes me feel like I'm less. It's not what I'm saying.Their blessing is not your lack of. You can encourage them. You can be happy for them. And at the same time, don't let that be a failure to you. Here's my encouragement for you for today.You're already fully known and deeply loved. No upgrade can add to that truth. That is a truth. So here's my encouragement for you. So here's your win, win for today.I want you to take five minutes today to write a thank you note. Nobody does this anymore. I'm not talking about a text, an email. I'm talking about on paper to someone who has blessed you.I don't know how many people actually have paper and pens can do this, but I'm telling you, it will work. Because shifting your focus from what you lack to how you've been loved kills comparison instantly. You can't live in that together. At the same time.You want to send me a message, that's cool too. But send somebody a handwritten thank you note. Thank them for what they've meant to you, what they've meant in your life.I try to do this every single day. Now, I gotta be honest with you. I don't always write them on paper, but I go out on social media, I go out on email, and I.And I send somebody every single day a thank you note for what they've brought to my life. And when you do that, man, it kills that comparison virus instantly. Let's look to Scripture. We're gonna go to Galatians, chapter 1, verse 10.It says, Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I was still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ. That one's sharp.But it provides the ultimate filter for our spending and our lifestyle. Are we acting for an audience of many or an audience of one? The only one that really matters. How about we pray to him right now, Lord?I pray for the heart that feels less than today. Break the chains of comparison that keep us bound to budgets we can't afford and lives we weren't meant to live.Help us to find our identity solely in being your children, Lord. Give us eyes to see the abundance already in our hands and the peace to rest in your perfect provision that you've already given us.And let our contentment be a light to the world that is always searching but never satisfied. And I ask this in the name of Jesus. Amen. Friend, you are enough because he is enough in you. You are enough because he is enough in you.You want us to tackle your financial question on the show? I would love to hear from you. You can send it to us by going to financiallyconfidentchristian.com/voicemail yeah, you can go right there.We'll put a link in the show notes. You can record a message for me. We'll play it on the show again. That's financiallyconfidentchristian.com/voicemail.Thank you so much for joining me today. I just want to say something. You are enough. Don't ever doubt that.Don't let this comparison world ever make you feel like you're less than, because if you know Christ, you've got it all. God bless you. And you have a great day today.