How Much Should You Pay Back a Kind Favor?

$900 A month. That's it. That's everything. Gotta cover your rent, gotta cover your food, gotta cover your transportation.Every unexpected bill, and all of it has to fit inside that $900 a month. So guess what? You're penny budgeting, aren't you? You're looking for more hours, you're trying. And then something good happened.A coworker noticed that you were paying for Ubers, maybe 15, $18 a ride, three times a week. And he just offered something to drive you. No ask, no strings. And instead of relief, you feel like it's a burden.So you convince them to let you pay something because that's the kind of person you are. And now you're wondering, is $60 a month fair or too generous with money you don't have? Your co worker already answered that.He messaged you and said, hey, just give me $15 a week, that's fine. And he meant it. So today we're talking about what generosity actually looks like on a tight budget. Not what's fair to him, but what's fair to you.Because you matter in this equation as well. Hello and welcome to Financially Confident Christian.And today we've got a listener who's making $900 a month trying to figure out how much to pay a co worker for rides. And this is a co worker who's already said he doesn't want any more money. This isn't really about the dollar amount. Today's about dignity.It's about gratitude and how to be generous when margin is almost zero. So today I'm going to break down the numbers, the relationship, and the right way to think about generosity when money is tight.So let's get right to today's listener question. Listener rate this. Hi, Ralph. I'm on a really tight budget. My take home pay is $900 a month and I'm penny budgeting just to make it work.A co worker found out that I was paying $18 per Uber ride three times a week and felt terrible about it. He offered to drive me home. Since he lives about three miles from me. He didn't want anything for it. But I felt awful just taking the favor.So I finally convinced him to let me pay him $15 every two weeks. So starting in August, I was planning to bump it up to $30 every payday, which is about $60 a month.Now, some people have told me that's too much given my income. But Ralph, he's saving me from walking five miles or spending hundreds on Ubers. I want him to know I Appreciate him.And then all of a sudden, he messaged me and said, he refuses the 60 bucks, Ralph. And he insists $15 is fine. So my question for you, is $60 fair, or am I being too generous for my own good? Thank you so much for that.What a great question. And we got to break this down. $900 A month. $60 Towards a ride isn't just generosity. That's a budget decision.And the best part is the coworkers already told you what he wants from you. So let's figure out how to make this work. As in all things, we gotta run the math. We gotta hear what he's actually saying.Here's what I think he's saying. You've Already said it. $18 Per ride on Uber three times a week is almost $216 a month. Your co worker is saving you $150 compared to Uber.Even if you pay him $60, that actual gas cost, what we're talking about here, three or four miles, he's going there anyway. Even if we do, the IRS standard mileage rate is less than $5 round trip. So even at $30, he's already being generous. But then he did the right thing.He messaged you and said, no, $15 is fine. He's not being polite. He's giving you information. Clearly, this purse is not doing it for the money, because he drives it rude anyway.And taking him at his word isn't being selfish. It's being respect. But I understand where you're coming from. This ride is worth a lot to you.But what you owe him in dollars is actually pretty small. And he's already told you what he wants. But we got to go a little deeper.We got to understand what $60 actually cost and how else you can show gratitude. A lot of people would say, well, $60, that's great, but $60 on a $900 a month budget is 7% of your income. That's not a small amount.That's a week of groceries, a phone bill, or part of a utility payment. And I'm guessing you're still carrying some debt. What if you could take that $60 and pay off some debt?The best part is your co worker has already told you they don't want the money. So there's other things you can do. There's other ways to show gratitude. Here. Maybe you can help them with something practical.Maybe ask them if you can do anything for them. A favor. Or maybe it's a skill they don't have. Hey, something simple as a handwritten note. Thank you so much for what you're doing for me.And then when your situation changes, maybe you can revisit that amount. Maybe you can do a ride sharing. Maybe you get to a point where you have your own vehicle.This generosity doesn't have to be permanent at its current level. A lot of people don't get this, but gratitude and payment are not the same thing. And you don't have to confuse them.But one of the practical things I think you need to start thinking about is building your own path towards transportation independence. Your real goal in the end is eventually not to need this arrangement. I've got some practical ideas. Maybe a bike, maybe there's a bus route.I don't know where you live. Maybe there's some carpooling with other co workers, maybe even setting aside some small money to start a transportation fund.The coworker's kindness had bought you time. Use some of that to build towards a more stable option. So accept that grace. Accept that. Thank you.Stay with that $30, that $15, and put that money to work to build that transportation budget for yourself. Now, you used a specific phrase that stood out to me in your question today. You said you didn't want to take advantage of his kindness.And that very phrase tells me a lot about who you are. Most people, dare I say most people, would in your situation, just take the free ride and move on.I remember when I was in high school, two doors up the street from me, a kid lived. We went to the same high school and I drove him to school every day and I drove him home every day.Not one time did he ever offer to put any gas in my gas tank that's taken advantage. But see, you can't do that this way. You're wired. You feel like this need to give something back. You need to feel like you're standing on your own.That instinct that you're feeling is not a problem. It's actually good stewardship of a relationship. You understand the value of a relationship. It works both ways.But here's what I want you to hear today. Receiving help is not the same as taking advantage. There are so many people who can't accept help. It's okay to accept help.That doesn't mean you're taking advantage of somebody. Jesus said it himself in Acts 20:35, it's more blessed to give than to receive. Your co worker is living Jesus message right now. Let him do that.He gets to be the blessing in your story this season. And that's not a small thing for him, that's a gift you're giving him. By accepting what he's offering, you're not a burden to him.If he didn't want to do it, he wouldn't do it. He sees you as someone that's in a hard season, and he's found a person with a generous heart. Relish in that.I truly believe that God puts people like that in our lives for a reason. Your job isn't to overpay your way out of feeling like a burden. Your job right now is to build on that budget.Steward wisely, keep your head up and trust that this season will change because it will. See, the very fact that you've even asked this question proves that you're not taking anyone for granted. You're not taking advantage at all.You're just trying to do right by someone who did right by you. And that's a beautiful thing. So here's your win for today. I want you to write down your actual transportation options and what each one costs.Look at the Ubers, look at the bus routes, and make a choice of just one thing that would work so that you don't feel like you're a burden. But stop worrying about this current arrangement. This person is doing this because they choose to find ways to reward that with a note.Maybe bake them some cookies. I mean, there's a whole bunch of things you can do to make them feel good about it. But stop stressing about it. People want to do this for you.Accept it and work from that and build your situation. Hey, maybe at some point you're going to be this person giving other people rides to work. Let's get to our Bible verse today.We talked about this a second ago. This comes from the Acts of the apostles, chapter 20, verse 35.In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work, we must help the weak. Remembering the words that Lord Jesus himself said, it is more blessed to give than to receive.And as I said earlier, your co worker is living this verse right now. He's not driving you for the money. He's driving you because he can. It cost him almost nothing and it means everything to you.That's a blessing he's choosing. So accept the blessing. Don't take that away from him by insisting on an amount he's already said he doesn't need. Let him give.And then when that situation changes, maybe you'll get to be that person for somebody else. Let's pray together. Heavenly Father, I just want to thank you so much for today's listener. Today's listener was such an encouragement to me.They're working hard, they don't have a lot and they're doing it with integrity. I just want to reach out and thank that co worker that you placed in their life. Someone with a generous spirit.It is so great to hear that that's still happening today. Who showed up without being asked. And Lord, I just ask that you would help this listener receive that gift without shame.Give them the wisdom to manage what they have to do it carefully, including the money they want to give. Protect them from guilt that already makes us over give before we are ready. And Father, let this season be temporary. Open a door towards more hours.Lord, a second income for them or maybe a change in their situation. Lord, they are not asking for a miracle, just a little more margin and I just ask that you would meet them there in Jesus name Amen friend.You came with a generous heart and a tight wallet and that combination is harder to carry than most people realize. Staying at $15 to pay isn't selfishness, it's listening to someone who told you exactly what they need.So as I said, be practical, look at the actual costs, thank them, be grateful for what they're doing. And it doesn't have to be in dollars. It can be a note, whatever those things are.And start looking at your transportation plan and look for other options if this ends up not working out. Now maybe you've got a question for the show as well. I encourage you to send me your question. You can go to financiallyconfidentchristian.com/questionWe'll put a link in the show notes, but again it's financiallyconfidentchristian.com/question Thank you so much for joining me today. I want to encourage you as I do every day. Thank you. Stay financially savvy.May God bless you and you have a great day.