Ashamed of Your Money Mistakes? Ready to Reflect?

Speaker A00:00:28

Let's start with today's listener question. Ralph I feel stuck looking back on my finances like I didn't grow enough.How can I look back and learn from my past financial decisions without getting discouraged? Well, let me tell you right now, you're not alone in that. In fact, listen to this.Bankrate reports that 63% of Americans say they feel behind on their financial goals. So listen, you're right there with most of us, two thirds to think about it. But I love what psychologist Brad Klonz notes.He said financial reflection is, is the bridge between frustration and growth and it's how we change the pattern. So today we're going to talk about how to change patterns because when you feel stuck, it is so tempting to avoid looking back.But reflection, that looking back isn't punishment. I want to start by telling you that it's preparation and it's where progress becomes visible and God's faithfulness becomes clear.Let's change the pattern of how you think on today's show.

Speaker B00:01:20

This is Financially Confident Christian, your daily dose of gospel, grounded insight and faith driven tips for to help you break the cycle of financial shame with confidence.

Speaker A00:01:31

Hello and welcome back. I'm Ralph. This is the show where we come at you every day helping you to break that cycle of financial shame with confidence.And I'm so excited today as we launch a new series for the month and I'm calling this the December Reset. Reflect, refocus and prepare for the new year. Because listen, if we're going to be successful in the new year, guess what that's going to take?It's going to take a little preparation. It's not just going to happen on its own.And you might be saying, okay, who is this guy, Ralph, Listen, I'm gonna tell you right now, I've been helping families and business owners just like you for 30 years. I've helped people evaluate their finances with grace, not guilt, because it's so easy to feel bad about yourself.Today's listener question is all about that I've seen in my own life where that reflection turns regret into gratitude. That's what we're gonna talk about today, is gratitude. Now you might be saying, ralph, okay, that sounds good, but have you ever felt this?Well, let me tell you, I felt this and I felt it real deep in my bones.I never Forget back in 2008, the economy in the United States really was struggling and my business started to struggle a little bit, to be honest with you. I don't like to admit this sometimes, but it got a Little bit tough. And I thought to myself, well, how am I going to fix this problem?That would have been real easy to just push forward and say, well, you know, everything will be fine. I'll just keep moving forward. But I thought about it. I said, you know what I really have to do? I told clients this time and time again.I said, go back and reexamine where you are. And to be honest with you, as the accountant, I had never done that. I never really examined those nitty gritty details.And I thought to myself, why are you worried about it? To be blunt, I was afraid of what I'd see. But when I finally did it, it was actually a reassuring thing because I realized how far I had come.I look back to when I'd started my business with just a handful of clients, and by this time in 2008, man, that had grown out. Did I see some warning signs on the horizon? Sure I did. But when I went back and looked at it, I learned where I could improve.The other thing I did, which is super important, is I accepted some small victories along the way.Because, listen, you got to embrace the victories because if you stay mired down and, well, this didn't work, and this didn't work, you're going to get discouraged. But I accepted those small victories.At the same time, though, I reflected on some things that I could change when I was really honest with myself and I looked back at the business that, well, here sells some things I could change.Well, you could do the same thing with your personal finances, but when you reflect, and I'm going to give you a way to do that on today's show, but when you reflect, you can see some things that might need to change. So let's get back to our question, and that's how can I look back and learn from my past financial decisions without getting discouraged?Because, yes, it's super easy to get discouraged. Well, we came up with what we're going to call the clear plan. That's C, L, E, A, R. I'm going to break these down for you.But basically the clear plan, number one thing with the C, celebrate. See, gratitude opens your eyes to God's provision. So start by celebrating that. That's the first in the letter. Clear C, L, E, A, R. But celebrate.Because when you celebrate, when you have that gratitude, you'll see just how much God has actually given you. Well, the second letter is L and that stands for learn. We all have to learn that mistakes are lessons in our stewardship.Listen, I'm going to let you out a little secret right now. You're not going to be perfect. You're going to make mistakes. I make mistakes. I have a degree.I have a master's in business administration and degree in accounting. Guess what? I make financial mistakes. You're going to make mistakes as well, but the key is to learn from them.So number two is the L, and that's learn. The E stands for examine. Now, a lot of people don't like the examination thing.You picture this light bulb above your head and it's pointing down on you. But you've got to critically look at your data. You can't sugarcoat. It's real easy to say, well, you know, things aren't too bad. Wasn't a big deal.That's called sugarcoating it. Sugarcoating it isn't going to help you. You got to critically look at the data.If you're examining your personal finances, look at where you're spending your money. Look at the direction of where your money's going, which leads us to A, and that's accept. Listen, we all make mistakes.I started by saying this a little while ago. None of us are perfect. If you're looking for perfection, you're going to constantly struggle. So accept that you've made mistakes.But the last is R, and that's refocus. So once you examine, once you learn, once you accept.But then you have to refocus because you got to use what you've learned to plan faithfully for the year ahead because it's real easy to stay stuck. But listen again, clear. Celebrate, learn, examine, accept, and refocus. Well, let me tie this into the Bible.We got a great verse from the Bible today. It comes from the book of Lamentations. I don't think I've actually ever used this one on the show, but. Lamentations, chapter 3, verse 40.It says, Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord. Well, think about that. Examine our ways. That's exactly what I'm talking about today.It doesn't say to get mired down in this feeling like you can't do it. Listen, you are going to struggle. You are going to fail. I remember the first time I rode my bike.I got on that bike and, man, I was tearing off for a couple seconds, and next thing you know, I'm laying in the side again. Well, you got to get back up and try again. And that's what it takes to really start the new year off with that clear focus. Well, let's pray together.Father God, we come to you right now. We just thank you for the growth that you've given us, that we've overlooked.And Lord, as we examine this, as we refocus in this season, Lord, help us to understand how we can change things. And Lord, give us grace to learn without guilt. It's so easy to get stuck in that fear and that situation of guilt.And Lord, we just ask for your wisdom to help us plan this next season of our lives, understanding that we've made mistakes. And we ask for your grace. Grace. And we ask for your mercy in this. Lord, show us how to be wise stewards of the things you've already provided for us.And we ask this in the name of Jesus. Amen. All right, you ready for your action item? Today we're going to start off on the positive note.I want you to list three wins, three lessons, and one area growth from this year. What is that going to mean? It means you're going to go back and look at what happened this year. Don't sugarcoat it. Go back and look what went on.Look at the things that worked, look at the things that didn't work, but really celebrate those wins. But then also take some time and say, you know what, I could really work on this.And then just take a minute and thank God for his faithfulness during all of this. And one of the ways you can continue your faithfulness. We just launched a new group. It's called the Financially Covenant Christian Community.And this is a wonderful place where you can go and share wisdom with other people. We can support one another and we can pray through every financial decision. It's a place to connect. It's a place to grow, and.And it's a place to walk in confidence together. If you're interested in joining it, it's absolutely free as a simple membership. You can go to financiallyconfidentchristian.com/join again.That's financiallyconfidentchristian.com/Join now. When you get there, you're going to find that there are some ways that you can upgrade if you want to support the show. So I encourage you to do that.But you can join absolutely free. Again, that's at financiallyconfidentchristian.com/join. So today take a moment to reflect because that reflection brings clarity.Once you take time to do that, then you can help God to use you to review and renew your path forward. Remember, you're not behind. You're being refined. So step forward in faith, knowing every season has, and we all have seasons in our lives.Every season is shaping what's next for you. So go out there today. I encourage you to be that financially confident Christian, because, listen, I know you can do this.Even amidst this time of really going back and seeing what happened. You have the skills to do this. You have the ability to do it. But better than all those things, God is with you.And if God is with us, who can stand against us? So today I want to encourage you, stay financially savvy out there. God bless you. And I'll see you again tomorrow on the show.